I just launched a new radio show (hearttalkradio.com) with two really amazing women, Maryanne Comaroto and Kristine Carlson, sharing healing, relationship and spiritual tips to explore and guide us all along our heart paths—the ever-winding labyrinth of life.
On our show last week the topic was moving from the Head to the Heart...so here is a little more on the topic!
Let’s explore the concept of operating our lives from our heads and/or our hearts. For me this is almost the same discussion as operating from our left-brain—our analytical, logical, practical thinking mind—or our right-brain—our creative, colorful, expressive, intuitive mind. While some may argue one is better than the other, the truth is that when we have access to both, we are immensely better equipped to use our full range of capabilities—our intelligence and our intuition, our head and our gut feelings.
In my experience, when we are “in our heads,” we get cut off from our hearts. We make decisions that are based solely on the bottom line, we often miss the subtleties of human well-being, happiness, joy and spiritual growth. When we are thinking (rather than feeling), analytical, needing to be right—we get caught up in our egos and we tend to push people away.
When we are solely in our hearts—operating entirely on feelings, emotions and perhaps even desires—we can also make poor decisions and push people away. Our decisions may be based on “feels good” rather than taking the time to be sure that the relationship IS good.
We clearly need access to both to manage our highest level of ability to make wise decisions about life and love. The problem I have found, however, is that when I am in my head, I have no access to my heart. However, when I am in my heart, I can access my head. It is as if, in order to use both, one must be open-hearted, in order to be open-minded.
To me, the whole point is entwined with the concept of my intended destination. If my goal is a loving, harmonious relationship with someone else, then the steps I take, head and heart hand in hand, need to be leading toward that goal. If my steps are leading me away from that goal, chances are one or the other (head or heart) has taken the lead and I am, literally and figuratively, missing the mark.
So how do we take the journey from head to heart and then back to the head without losing the connection to one’s heart? Practice and Experiment.
1) Practice: See if you can move your attention back and forth from head to heart to feel the difference. When we are in our heads, there is often a sense of being hard. When we are in our hearts, there is often a sense of being soft. The difference may be blatant or subtle depending on your sensitivity so start by closing your eyes and intentionally getting isolating and getting acquainted with both. These two work better together than apart, but they don’t know each other well, introduce yourself to them, see if you can make them “friends.”
2) Journal: Explore a question or concern with both hands, both sides of an issue. Put a pen in your dominant hand and write down how a situation should be handled and then put the pen in your non-dominant hand and see if there is a difference. In general, your dominant hand speaks in the voice of the head (or left-brain) and your non-dominant hand speaks in the voice of your heart (or right-brain). Can one convince the other, or is there a path somewhere between the two that clearly leads toward your goal?
Once you start to feel and know the difference between your head and heart, their “voices” will literally become recognizable. When you hear your own thoughts, you will be able to identify the source of the suggestion, listen to your head and your heart, and make a wise decision taking both into your council.
Intellectual Foreplay of the Week: Do you operate more from your head or from your heart?
Love Tip of the Week: Know thyself—both sides of the brain, on one hand and the other, the head and the heart—get them all on your team.
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